Because Kieran won’t play Uno with her.
Because I make her eat her tea.
Because of my face (?)
Because a bird pooed on her head last week.
Because I don’t let her eat pudding if she doesn’t eat her befores.
Because sometimes at school other girls call her names.
Because sometimes at school she calls other girls names.
Because Daddy tickled her too much.
Because Daddy won’t tickle her.
Because I laughed.
Because Daddy laughed.
Because we didn’t laugh.
Because I made her fold up her clothes.
Because I suggested daily teeth cleaning would promote healthy teeth and minty breath.
Because I don’t love Zayn from 1D.
Because Baby Abigail frightens me to death and her eyes follow me round the room.
BECAUSE I JUST DON’T UNDERSTAND HOW HARD IT IS TO BE JASMINE!!!!
Reasons Jasmine likes me:
Because I’m hers. (I’ll let her off then)